All In The Family . . . .

Next week is a special time for the family, Passover.  I'll be spending it with my family both Seder nights (with the aid of some interesting travel plans), and it'll bring back a few memories.

When I was a kid, my Mom was the Hostess With the Mostest!  Or as my sister would sometimes call her, the Mitzvah Mommy!  I can still remember the smell of her Matzah Ball Soup, her chicken, her brisket, her special matzah stuffing (there's a way this can be done without bread, though I hesitate to ask), and "all the trimminings."  I also had a wise old grandfather from the old country (every family should still have at least one of these) who lent some old-school authenticity to the proceedings.

Not everyone in the Tribe is always so enthusiastic about Passover.  Traditionally, there are many dietary laws that Jews have kept since the Exodus itself.  For example, no bread, because Moses and the Israelites didn't have time to let the bread bake (meaning, slowly baking on a fire overnight so it would rise), so they took "unleavened bread" to eat on the way out of Egypt.  So instead, we eat matzah -- those of us in the know realize that it's not supposed to taste amazingly good, but so many people who aren't Jewish always ask for a taste, since they may think of it as exotic cuisine!  Also, no pasta, and depending on where in Europe ones' ancestors came from, no beans or rice either.

Also, the Seder I speak about means that the dinner for Passover is given in the form of a ritual.  Blessings to say over parts of the meal, old-time Hebrew songs to sing, and everyone gets to read a page going around the table.  Much to my grandmother's chagrin, she always got stuck reading a page containing the ancient passage, "I Once Was Young, Now I Am Old!"

Some of my Brethren completely reject these old-school ways, while some of them keep them.  And then some keep them and complain, murmur, and whine about how much they don't like it. 

To those of the third category, I say this:  If doing without elements of your diet for one week, and reading from an old religious text at your dinner table is that much of a hardship for you, do yourself, and everyone else a favor, and stop doing it.  Really, please!  People already know that keeping non-mainstream religious practices are uncomfortable and sometimes unpleasant.  People also already know that they don't always fit with regular mainstream activities.  But when people hear anybody of any particular faith or stripe making a half-hearted attempt to keep a tradition while simultaneously rejecting it, they lose respect for it and you.  They'll think you're not genuine, and that you're not credible.  And that's a lot harder to stomach than the Missing Afikoman!

So for those of you spending Passover with pizza and beer, don't let me stop you.  I'm no Talmudic scholar, I have no right to judge your beliefs or your practices, and I won't.
For those of you keeping Passover, I tip my hat to you, and respect that you honor tradition.
But for those of you complaining about keeping it, you're doing yourselves a disservice.  Nobody's forcing you to do it if you hate it so much, so stop.  If G-D has a problem with it, He will tell you, and nobody else will.

Maybe you're an intellectual who can prove for all of us clueless religious types that G-D doesn't exist, and you feel the need to flaunt it in the faces of family members who think differently.  Maybe you have bad memories of Seders gone by, when you had to just sit still and listen to things that didn't appeal to you.  Or maybe it just didn't fit with who you were and are.  That's valid, except for the "flaunting in the face" part -- so why keep doing it if you don't like it? 

A family guilt trip, maybe?  A misguided notion that a half-hearted tradition is better than none at all?  Or maybe because the majority of the household is "appeasing" a single member who wants these traditions when nobody else does?  NOT valid reasons.  Any scroll or text from any faith will tell you that inviting G-D into your house begrudgingly doesn't work.  If you hate it, don't do it, case closed.  You'll get tons more respect that way.

DISCLAIMER:  The above post was not meant to cast aspersions or judgment on any individual person, known or unknown, living or dead.  Any offense taken by the above post is purely the perception and the responsibility of the reader.